Thursday, February 26, 2015

The sun is struggling through the grey skies this morning.  Our February has been unseasonably warm and bright. I am thankful for the sunshine, always.

School is pushing forward, we are nearly done with our Classical Conversations year, Nate, Eli and I have class until the end of March and Joey's goes into April.  I do love our community, it is such a nice reprieve & encouragement mid-week but I am looking forward to being freed up for Spring.  I'm certain that the Moms that set the CC schedule were all thinking of tossing the lesson planning (for CC) and grabbing their seeds and trowels come April.

This Spring we anticipate getting our license for foster/adopt.  We started the process last fall, and are hoping that in 2 or 3 months things will be wrapped up.  There have been hours of classes to take, certifications to acquire, baby proofing to do all over our home, that is a monumental task!  While I don't at all feel that my heart and hands are out of practice (I may be surprised yet) our home has slowly morphed into the home of pre-teen and teenage boys.  We still have work to do around here, but it's coming along.

Our friends and family have been so generous in supplying us with so much we anticipate needing.  We plan to be certified for babies: birth to 2.  We have a crib, toddler bed, sheets, blankets, gates, diapers, car seat, shoes, clothes, (mostly for boys) bottles, pacifiers, and so much more.  There are still gaps to fill but we are picking things up as we wait.  It's a hopeful process, but not one that goes without heartache.

Sometimes I linger in the nursery.  The light is calm in there, the walls are a lovely grey, the white curtains are heavy and soften the light from the windows.  As I stand there, wondering and praying for the little one(s) that will soon be here my heart breaks a little.  I know that these little ones will be coming to us with broken lives.  So young, but already wounded.  I am torn over knowing that we can have a huge role in the lives of these families, we may be able to encourage the bio parents as they work to get their lives in order so that they can have their babies at home.  There will also be times that these babies go home to parents that do not have their babies' best in mind.  I am torn because I want the best for these babies.  Sometimes the best would be that they would be with their bio parents. Sometimes adoption would be the best thing, and  while adoption is a wonderful, God-designed plan, a child that is adopted has also been rejected.  Every adopted child I have known seems to deal with this in different ways, but God knows what it means to be "given up" on.  I am torn because we would love to adopt, and that may or may not happen.

There is one good way to prepare our hearts for this journey, and that is prayer.  I know that this journey will impact all of us, the boys especially.  I pray and pray that God will prepare us and walk with us through of this, I know He'll be faithful to help us, this whole thing is His idea and we know He gives us what we need.

                     His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life
                     and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to 
                     his own glory and excellence by which he has granted to us his
                     precious and very great promises, so that through them you
                    may become great partakers of the diving nature, having
                    escaped from the corruption.      2 Peter 1:3

The house has been quiet but I hear stirring upstairs, time for me to get up and get going with my day. Until next time...